--Moblin Slayer
(my sig)
Hola. I'm a user here on Zeldapedia (duh.) Well, I've played most Zelda games. The only one I really haven't played a huge amount is Link's Awakening (I did play for minutes at a time at a friends house, though, and it was my first Zelda game.)
So...If you need some help, you can ask me. I'm pretty good at most things. You're better off asking one of the admins, though.
That's not saying don't know anything. I am rollback, and I didn't get that by doing nothing...In addition, I hope to run for admin someday (after my last attempt, I don't think it will be for a while, though...)
Contents
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My Theories
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Time for the Theories
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First of all, you will never see me supporting ludracris theories that are supported by evidence that is purely circumstacial. Before anyone says anything, some of these are jokes.
- Zant is not descended from an Oocca (don't ask...it brings back bad memories)
- Link is NOT a Vampire...
- The goddesses turned the Zoras into the Rito in order to prevent the Zoras from finding Old Hyrule.
- I do believe in the split timeline theory; I just like explaining how the single-timeline theory is plausible.
- The Shiekah/Gerudos did not evolve into the Rito. Most of the Shiekah were supposedly dead (I say this because there may have been some that weren't in the game) and if the Gerudo evolved into the Rito then the Rito would probably mostly female.
- If the Zoras did not evolve into the Ritos, then they evolved into the Fishmen.
- The Fierce Deity was created by the goddesses to seal away Majora in a mask. The goddesses, fearing the firece deity's power, then sealed him in a mask.
- Majora was the god/goddess of evil/mayhem/destruction.
- Majora had to be sealed in a mask because gods/goddesses can't be killed.
- The goddesses are sadistic. Why else would they have created an artifact which would create wars, cause millions to suffer, and cause the rise of an evil king?
- The skull kid from TP is emo. His idea of a fun game is being shot at with arrows.
- Fishman is also emo. He says that shooting arrows at him will make his back feel better (or something like that). Trust me, it only makes it feel worse.
- Dangoro (giant goron in Goron Mines in TP) must have reallyyyyy wanted that armor. It's nailed into his skin. Nailed into his skin.
- Stallord is not Volvagia's skeleton. How would Volvagia's skeleton have ended up in the desert? Also, Stallord has a different body shape and number of fingers. In addition, Stallord is much larger than volvagia.
- Ganondorf isn't as smart as he claims. If he was, he'd go to Link at the beginning of the game when Link has only three hearts and kill him in one shot.
- Volvagia doesn't like eating Gorons...he likes eating high-quality rocks...but he can't get to Dodongo's Cavern, and the Gorons are pretty rocky soooo...
Alternatives
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- The fierce deity was the god of evil, and created Majora for destruction/mayhem. For whatever reason, Majora failed, so the fierce deity sealed his powers in a mask and gave the mask to someone to pusish Majora. Majora, desperate to live, sealed himself/herself into a mask.
- The goddesses were tricked by an evil being (cough,cough,majora,cough,cough) to create the Triforce. The evil being knew what its creation would cause; the goddesses didn't.
- Fishman invented "Extreme Acupuncture."
Timeline Theories
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Fanfic
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Sorry, I just have too many fanfics to tell you about all of them.
Userboxes
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My Talkboxes
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Vital Statistics
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| Game | Times Beaten | Current Progress | Other Info |
| Legend of Zelda | 0 | About Halfway through the Fourth Dungeon | Can't seem to find any keys, and the only way to get more is to save up 80-ish rupees, which takes a long time... |
| The Adventure of Link | 0 | Trying to beat Swamp Palace | Least Favorite Zelda Game to date. |
| A Link to the Past | 2-3 | Beat the Palace of the Four Swords; have since sold game (big mistake). | My first "classical" Zelda Game, and my favorite. |
| Link's Awakening | 0 | Have only played once; didn't get far | It was the game that first introduced me to Zelda; I remember looking over peoples' shoulders as they played just to get a glimpse... |
| Ocarina of Time | 2 | Need to collect some more pieces of heart. | Oddly enough, it's not my favorite Zelda game... |
| Ocarina of Time/ Master Quest | 0 | Don't own | I personally didn't find OoT to be too hard, so I think this would be nice to play. |
| Majora's Mask | 1 | Have collected all of the masks; need 5-6 heart containers... | Liked it better than OoT. |
| Oracle of Ages | 1 | Completed 100% | I got this after OoS |
| Oracle of Seasons | I've lost count... | Beat 100% without dying. | I was going to get LA, but the store was out, so I ended up getting this instead... |
| The Wind Waker | 2 | On the Wind Temple on my new file. | I found it! |
| Four Swords Adventures | 1 | Completed... | I don't consider this to be a real Zelda game, as there is no real challenge... |
| The Minish Cap | >3 | Have Completed 100% | I don't know why everyone considers this to be so hard to complete 100%... |
| Twilight Princess | 3 | My fastest run was >16 hours, without cheating. | Graphics were a bit over the top... |
| Phantom Hourglass | 1 | Need one more Courage Gem, Two more Golden Ship Parts... | Controls felt a bit gimmicky to me... |
UberRPG Character
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| Moblin Slayer
Slayer of moblins.
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ID Card
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| Moblin Slayer
Yes, I am a ninja in real life. Or at least that's what my nickname for track is...
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Random Stuff
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Anything below this line is random and probably irrelevant. Please still read it though, some of it is pretty cool/funny.
Jukebox
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I've gotta thank AK for introducing me to this band in the first place. They're pretty awesome. This is my favorite song by them. Times like these are when I wish I spoke Norweigian...
My Personal Gods
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And yes, I did steal this from AK.
My World History Teacher
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The greatest teacher anyone could wish for. Maybe its because of the blatant lies he makes up just to see who will believe him (he claims that he stole the Key to the Bastille, and he also used to have fun making 7th graders think the Earth is flat.) He was also one of the few teachers who show just the "good" parts of the history movies, i.e. the battle scenes.
Dave Grohl
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Who would have known that the drummer from Nirvana would be the most successful out of that trio from Seattle? Not only was he the drummer for Nirvana, but he also is the singer for the Foo Fighters, one of the godliest bands of all time. Not only that, but he has played drums with god knows how many famous artists.
Dexter Holland
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One of the greatest musicians of all time, and probably the only one to give up a Ph.D in microbiology to pursue a musical career. For those of you who don't know, he is the lead singer of the Offspring and owner of the record label that produced AFI. For those of you who don't know, the Offspring is the band that did the song "Pretty Fly for a White Guy."
And he claims to own a Soviet Fighter. What more could you want?
Tony Iommi
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If you don't know who this is, don't even claim you are a metal fan. He is none other than the guitarist for (in my opinion) the greatest band of all time, Black Sabbath. A pioneer of metal, he introduced the Drop-C tuning as the standard. This guy was the true force driving Black Sabbath, not Ozzy.
This guy also wins the "greatest left handed person ever" award. Just saying.
Revolver Ocelot/ADAM/Shalashanska
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The best character in the Metal Gear Solid series. Random meowing in MGS3 aside, this dude is one badass. For those who plan on playing the series, stop reading now, as I am about to ruin a kinda big plot detail.
Basically, this guy seems to work for the GRU (KGB rivals) the entire game, who are secretly double crossing the KGB; towards the end of the game, it is revealed he is none other than ADAM, an American agent; at this point, it is revealed that he is acting on direct orders from the director of the CIA. Essentially, the KGB didn't know he was working for the GRU who didn't know he was working for the Americans. And that takes a lot to pull off. And he does it armed with only two revolvers. AND his actions in this game indirectly led to the events in the rest of the MGS games. So he definitely is one of my personal gods.
Macduff
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The antagonist (and good guy, oddly enough) of Macbeth. He ends up killing Macbeth in the end. Unlike the protagonist, Macduff is a symbol of justice, righteousness, and morality. And he does that all while wielding a claymore. 'Nuff said.
My Favorites
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| Category | Best | Second Best | Third Best | Worst |
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| Male Character | Dark Link | Link | Ganondorf | Tingle |
| Female Character | Impa | Princess Ruto | Midna | Navi |
| Villain | Ganondorf | Dark Link | General Onox | Twinrova |
| Instuement | Guitar of Waves | Drums of Awakening | Ocarina of Time | Harp of Ages |
| Weapon | Biggoron's Sword | Light Arrows | Hookshot | Tingle Tuner |
| Games | MM | OoT | TP | AoL |
| Races | Gorons | Zoras | Yook | Anouki |
| Bosses (Other than main bosses) | Twinrova | Bongo Bongo | Volvagia | Odolwa |
| Story | OoT | MM | TP | TLoZ |
| Soundtrack | OoT | MM | TWW | TP |
| Cast | MM | TWW | TP | TLoZ |
| Monsters | Iron Knuckle | Darknut | Phantom | Gibdo |
| Dungeon | Ganon's Tower | Ganon's Tower | Spirit Temple | Shadow Temple |
Polls
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I'll change these up every so often...
Favorite Quotes
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Pi. Be rational.- Proof is the idol that the mathematician sacrifices himself in front of.
- What would happen to the Earth if we were hit by a giant meteor? Let's just say that the realistic simulation involving a sledge hammer and common labratory frog doesn't look too good.
- Giggidy-giggidy.
- For once I'd like someone to call me "sir" without adding "You're making a scene."
- I am the game and I want to play.
- How do you speel "Achmed?" ..."A," "C," "Phlegm..."
- Any "boot up your @$$" jokes by Red Foreman (That 70's Show.)
Things to Laugh At...
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- This... Really? They get their own wikia? What is this world coming to...
- Mad fish disease.
- My cat is trying to make me emo...
- My friend's jacket is trying to kill him...
- My brother tried to invent stunt sledding. It ended with the road...
Song Reviews
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Most Politically Inspired :Boom, by System of a Down
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You can't get much more political than this. For the video, there are average people protesting and actually singing the song. However, that's not the most politically inspired part. That would be the part showing Bush, Saddam Hussein, Osama Bin Laden, and the prime minister of Britain riding on bombs towards a town. All around, an awesome song, though it does give one a bit of a sinking feeling.
Most Seizure Inducing Music Video: Self Esteem or Come out and Play (Keep 'em Separated)
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This was hard to decide; more than half of the vids by the Offspring are seizure inducing. Both vids are essentially the same: half the video is done in false color, sometimes it randomly goes to an x-ray type view, there's lots of flashing lights....epileptics be warned: avoid these videos at all cost. If I had to choose one, I'd say that Self Esteem has probably induced more seizures.
Most Epic Metal Song: Murmaider (Dethklok)
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I stand corrected. It turns out a band from an adult Swim show wins this one. Genius lyrics and heavy guitar riffs make this song metal perfection.
Best Bands Ever
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- Dethklok
- Kaizer's Orchestra
- Black Sabbath
- Disturbed
- The Offspring
Worst....games...ever...
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Okay, so here I will make a list of "bad" games, an explanation of each, and why to avoid them.
The Red Star
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Okay, I actually kinda like this game. After attempting to beat it for about a year now, it's grown on me, like a fungus.
The game takes place in an alternate dimension based off the U.S.S.R. Basically, magic exists and the main bad guy (Troika) tries to use magic to do evil. You play as either one of two former Red Star (game's govt.) soldiers, Maya the magic user or Kyozu, big guy who looks like he's from Siberia and uses a double great sword (called a "hook"); or a Nokgorkan (place that resists Red Star's rule) rebel named Makita, who's weapons are (ironically) a sickle and hammer. All of the characters have guns; Kyozu has an AK-47, flame thrower, or Sniper Rifle; and Makita has dual Uzis, a gun that shoots in three directions, or a shotgun. I haven't had the chance to play as Maya, but her guns are magic based.
While I've been told that the game has a lot of replay value, that's just the problem; it's impossible to get through the game once. Basically, the game designers did whatever they could to make the game impossible to beat.
Here's why it's hard: Need to dodge bullets, small health meter, enemy attacks do lots of damage, rarely get chance to restore health, expensive upgrades, and earning money through how well you performed.
Here's why it's bad: Inability to replay levels, everything unlocked after nigh-impossible first play through, only three characters, each of whom only have three weapons, and the attempt at blending shooter and melee mechanics.
Overall, this game get's a -7 out of -10, for being generally frustrating, impossibly hard on the first playthrough, and not being fun until after beating the game once.
There's Nothing else. You can leave now...
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Since none of you seemed to notice, there really is nothing now.